Well kids, happy April. It’s Patriot’s Day week and April vacation for the Worcester Public Schools and what a week to be off; gorgeous weather to start the week; Boston Marathon and the Red Sox on Patriot’s Day, everyone’s out and about enjoying the sunshine, it’s finally spring. Hope you got out there and enjoyed it. Here’s what I’ve got…
1.Marathon Monday. Many venture into Boston to cheer on the runners or to catch the Patriot's Day game at Fenway Park. Some of my favorites were in Boston this week giving back and paying it forward, check out this badass for instance, Exhibit 1...one of The Antics favorites George Jones of George's Kitchen, participating in and completing Tough Ruck 2024. The money raised by Tough Ruck participants like George, provide much needed support for military families and the families of fallen heroes. Although this year's Tough Ruck is complete and George met his goal, the organization will take much needed donations at any time throughout the year. If you're interested in donating or would like to learn more, click here...
2. Having taken most of the week off from doing the work of the people, I had the opportunity to sit here earlier this morning sharing my Pop Tarts with my dogs and drinking a pot of coffee. It was all well and good until the people across the street had a parade of landscapers roll up sending this meathead Gibson into a tailspin. He failed to acknowledge my explanation that he did not have to fear said landscapers would ever come into our yard for anything, because he has managed to destroy every blade of grass that attempted to break through the dirt on our corner of the hood, that had been striving towards forming one plush lawn for the rest of us to enjoy. Job well done Gibson, you protected us from nature, again. #asshat
3. Started the week off with The Masters. I’m not going to claim to be a huge golf fan or have any idea who was playing, what was going on, or the first thing about it, but the rest of the Kap pack loves The Masters, Sue Miller included. The only time I had any idea
what was going on was when Sam could be heard saying, ahhh…he’s one of us…apparently that translates into some poor bastard hitting his ball into the woods or into the water.
4. Spent the gorgeous Tuesday we had this week at the Worcester County Courthouse. My least favorite place to be, ever, and it only made it worse because it was so nice out. Standing in line to get myself in there, there was a rather large man standing behind me struggling to get his shoes off to go through the metal detector, who told me that he hates the courthouse. Flood gates opened people as I told him I could relate, and that’s why I stay on the right side of the law, to avoid having to step inside its walls on a regular basis. He agreed crime doesn’t pay, telling me his badly thought-out choices had already been made, and there he was to pay the piper. Good luck sir let’s work together to stay the hell out of this place.
Exhibit 2, Beet was not at the courthouse and has committed no crimes...here she is taking on Fenway.
5. When arriving at the courthouse, I was surprised to meet fellow ESW employees also there to spend their morning milling around, waiting for their case to be heard, fun times to be had. Thrilled to have someone to hang out with, so I didn’t find myself sitting on the bench in the hallway with the guy who decided to make himself comfortable. Shoes off, sitting criss cross apple sauce, stealing the courthouse electricity, laptop plugged in, doing who knows what. Where do I begin…for starters, put those dogs away, no one needs to see them. Second, if you’re planning on kicking your shoes off in a public place, the least you can do is wear a pair of clean socks without holes in them, and third, why? This is not your living room, put your damn shoes back on, that’s gross. Get it together.
Exhibit 3, Sam and Casey, also not criminals, sporting their Antics gear.
6. To one of the newer Protective Services employees who was there, a rookie move was to be had, but don’t fear, she has been informed of and now understands the error of her ways. When leading the way inside to find a seat, do not, place yourself in a row closest to the front. That places you too close to the court officer who will not find humor in what you find funny, and this only makes it harder to talk when you’re not supposed to. Also, if you’re sitting up front, you can’t see what’s coming up behind you, or what kind of antics are taking place in the rows to the rear. If you’re going to be stuck sitting there all day, you may as well have a good view and be entertained by the shenanigans of others sitting in front of you.
7. Sue Miller, the youngest Kap kid and I were heading to Lowe’s yesterday to take a look at some outdoor gardening supplies and check out their houseplant selection, both of which were a disappointment, but I digress. Sitting at the light right before Lincoln Plaza in front of CVS, Meri noticed there was birds' nest full of baby birds nestled in the letter “a” in pharmacy. The youngest Kap kid reported that if she were a bird, she’d love to live there, nestled in the letter a, safely watching all the happenings on Lincoln Street below, a true bird of the hood. Exhibit 4, littlest birds of the hood
8. Our regular readers should be familiar with the ways I’ve failed my children via food choices. To refresh your memories, the oldest Kap kid says I denied him boxed instant pudding. Who knew making such items homemade would have such a lasting negative effect on my children. A traumatizing epiphany was had one day when he discovered boxed instant pudding mix on the grocery store shelves. The latest parenting fail is Chex Cereal. Chex Cereal is the cereal that made its way home from Wegmans this week and is the youngest Kap kids new favorite. Sitting at the table eating breakfast finding herself without milk, she doused that cereal in orange juice, and stated, what a great idea, Chex Mix deciding to make a cereal... Well kid, you have that backwards. Chex Cereal has been around forever and Chex Mix came after. I’d like to formally apologize to Mrs. Mahoney, God rest her soul, for not sharing this truth with the kid sooner. If you want the real deal and not the packaged Chex Mix, put yourself in touch with Kara Ludy or Maura Mahoney.
Exhibit 5 is for Jim Burns...I told you the kid ate her cereal with OJ. 🤢
9. That brings us to the subject of Orange Juice. A few weeks back, Tropicana Orange Juice was purchased for Mimosa’s on Girls Weekend, but our OJ supply was ample, the one I brought unused; therefore, it made its way back to the Kap house for our households' enjoyment. Once it was gone, it was replenished with Wegmans brand Orange Juice. A formal complaint was filed with the Grocery Getter and a variety of subtexts were included. a.) there was no pulp. b.) it tasted like watered down Sunny Delight, c.) the container looked like a beluga whale. d.) bring back the Tropicana...
Exhibit 6, Helen and Kramey, like Beet, also not criminals, spending their day at at Fenway.
10. Patriot's Day week in what seems like a million years ago, we packed up the Kap kids, the youngest one still in a stroller, heading out to Lexington MA before 4 am in order to get to the Lexington Green to watch the Reenactment of the First Shot Heard Around the world. The Battles of Lexington and Concord on April 19th, 1775, the famous 'shot heard 'round the world', marked the start of the American War of Independence (1775-83). Politically disastrous for the British, it persuaded many Americans to take up arms and support the cause of independence. Apparently, all this core memory managed to do was persuade the middle Kap kid to take up arms against Paul Revere, festering her unfounded and unrealistic fear and disdain of a man who lived almost three hundred years ago, whom she's never met. She doesn't like him, the American Revolution, property that resembles that of that era, muskets, white wigs, gunshots, smoke, revolutionary era clothing, none of it...this is what happens when you drag your kid out of bed before 4am over April vacation to experience Patriot's Day.
Speaking of weird...Exhibit 7, Derek the plant has a new pot, and he loves it.
And last but not least...it's allergy season kids. It looks beautiful outside, but don't get sucked in by all that warm air and sunshine. In that warm air lurks all that pollen and allergens that are just itching to irritate you.
Have a great weekend!
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